We’re a bunch of not very wise
Guys who get around
With no very sound
Or clear ideas of exactly where
In either of two hemispheres
We’re bound.
We’ve visited Malta
Parcel-package-toured
Gibraltar,
Constructed - a couple of
Castles in Spain
In which we were briefly immured
Had a merry spree in gay Paree
Ducked heads - in the muddy old Seine
but now
We’re paddling up the Amazon
Following Dr Jameson
Or was it Colonel Fawcett?
If each of us had a horse, it
Would speed up our progress
We might even grow less
Impatient at traipsing a mile a day
It’s no joke, oh no!
It rather puts the dampers on
When after weeks of row, row, row
Instead of up the Amazon
You find you’re down the Orinoco!
We say:
You should have seen us then
A bunch of angry men
Doing the Frug in a dug-out canoe
Up the Amazon.
Up the Amazon,
One of us had a shirt
None of us had a shoe
Not the proper de rigueur rig-out to
See a man through
On our mission
This weird expedition
Up the Amazon
Once on a boozy cruise with the Watusi
We remember feeling woozy
Till a witchdoctor said
You all look half-dead
Here’s my cure, and it’s a doozy
If you want to have some fun, my son
The real glamour’s in
Going up the Amazon!
Get your silk pyjamas on -
No one cares a damn who’s on
Board, when you’re going
Crazy up the Amazon
Zooming through the basin
Where Montezuma played the ace in
Games of baccarat and blackjack
With Cortez and his pack rats
Soaked up sun and rainstorm
Rum distilled from sugarcane
Warm as toast in the Brazilian jungle
Hoping to find some fun – girls
Who go shrinking a million heads
Instead of silly men’s egos -some fun!
Drunken men dunking shrunken heads
In the Amazon!
Nevertheless, here we go, saying:
We’re paddling up the Amazon
With our silk pyjamas on
Tracing Colonel’s Fawcett’s tracks
Along this never-ending river.
When we find El Dorado, the taxman won’t see us for gold dust
Nothing then will hold us
Back from spending
A fortune every day
We say:
You should have seen us then
Teken in op LitNet se gratis weeklikse nuusbrief. | Sign up for LitNet's free weekly newsletter.